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Khatmiya English Forum For Presentation and Publication of Khatmiya Islamic & Arabic Heritages

Computer Tech Support Calls

Khatmiya English Forum

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قديم 06-14-2010, 09:13 PM   #1
علي الشريف احمد
المُشرف العام
الصورة الرمزية علي الشريف احمد



علي الشريف احمد is on a distinguished road

افتراضي Computer Tech Support Calls


أنا : علي الشريف احمد




الحمد لله رب العالمين والصلاة والسلام على اشرف الانبياء والمرسلين سيدّنا محمد وآله وصحبه أجمعين، وبعد:

السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته


These "silly tech support calls " have been around in e-mails and online since the dawn of tech support.

They are always fun to read. I'm in the mood for a good laugh. How 'bout you?


**********


Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the Button?

Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.

Customer: No, wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... Sorry....


**********


Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one...

Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?


**********


Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.

Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates.


**********


Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...


**********


Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?

Customer: Aaaah....... ......... ....thank you.


**********


Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.


**********


Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?

Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back

Customer: OK

Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes

Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work...


**********


Tech support: Your password is the small letter "a" as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?


**********


Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?

Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?

Customer: Five stars.


**********

Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.

Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer : Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.


**********


Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.


**********


Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.

Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?


**********


A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
Tech support: Are you running it under windows?

Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine."


**********


And last but not least...


Tech support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager"
Customer: I don't have a P.

Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?

Tech support: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!


**********

علي الشريف احمد غير متواجد حالياً  
عزيزنا الزائر لن تتمكن من مشاهدة التوقيع إلاَّ بتسجيل دخولك
قم بتسجيل الدخول أو قم بالتسجيل من هنا
رد مع اقتباس
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